Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Whore Sex Vs. Not Whore Sex, Episode 4


Painting by John Currin, who is doing amazing things with porn images painted with Old Master techniques.

(Episodes One, Two, Three)

Pre-dawn, I usually wake up right before the beep but today it yanks me out of sleep, the puzzled “why did I set the alarm?” feeling lasting for a few minutes. Out of bed, first thing move all my stuff to the hall, laptop, suitcase, extra bag, pillow, make all the noise at once so Husband can go back to sleep. Why am I doing this again? Oh yes, taking Husband to Europe, every day of whoring is another week abroad.

Space heater on in the bathroom so I won’t freeze after the shower, contacts in, teeth brushed and flossed. Home dermabrasion with my hair in a band. It’s a trade-off – better skin, more pimples (say breakouts, Mandy, it sounds less disgusting, do you want them to think you’re gross?) from taking off the layers.

Into the hot water, shave all the bits, grit in my mouth from the dermabrasion, how the hell does it get there? Towel dry, blow dry, hate hate hate my hair, I just got it cut and it won’t do a damn thing. Makeup, I never used to wear makeup, my best eyeshadow is starting to crumble and only half-used. Undies, cute enough to be seen in, comfortable enough to travel in, bra bought with Be My Real Friend’s money so he can see it, leggings, top, hot pink mini that’s on the safe side of funky/trashy. The hair still sucks, no product can save it, the straightening iron helps but not a lot. Keep it down, men like it loose no matter how awful it is. Last kisses goodbye, pat all the cats, and into the morning, thank God it didn’t snow enough to have to dig out the car.

The sun rises. Breakfast burrito. Mocha with only half the coffee. Two hours of more-boring-than-usual NPR, a chat with Secret Scientist, a chat with Lover (still my safety friend), through security and onto the plane.

Know what sucks about whoring? The hours.

6 comments:

Chalcedony said...

And the mornings flying solo to not-be-solo later are grating as always.

So! Trudged to the package room after work to pick up a textbook. Was surprised at the two-packages-not-one awaiting me. And flat-out squealed upon feeling the outline of a CD case through the envelope. I'm sure the postal workers were confused by the suddenly-cheerful young Asian woman grinning down the hallway.

The message written on the surface was simple and familiar; still left me breathless. Fine-point Sharpie on a circle of plastic works just as well as text on this screen. Maybe it's the handwriting? As an editor and reader, I have a masochistic fondness of unfamiliar handwriting. And yours works so well. Whatever the case, thank you!

(music or voice are the very foundations of my joys in life-- and I greatly enjoyed all of the tracks [and smiled wistfully/winced/nodded appropriately at the lyrics that fit. I cracked up at the Discovery Channel song]. Simply fantastic. Obviously, my excitement is making me babble. I'm going to clam up now.)

Mandy said...

So pleased you liked it :) I had so much fun putting the track list together, and spent a lot of time listening to it over and over to set the order.

All the cd's got individual messages, written on the plane - some were thoughts triggered from pages in my notebook that I'm crystallizing into posts, some will never go beyond the surface of the cd, all were written spontaneously and it was hard to say, no, don't copy them down or keep track, just send them out and let them go.

Thanks for telling me you liked it :)

Anonymous said...

I received my CD on Tuesday and as today is the first day I have some quiet time I am looking forward to listening. It sounds like you agonize over playlists in the same way that I do - trying to get the flow right - so I promise to turn off the shuffle and listen to it straight through. Thanks too for the gift of your handwriting, which is so personal and a lovely touch. I especially like knowing that no two CDs are the same. Ciao for now. RR

Anonymous said...

I guess this is where we rave about the CD. :)

Thank you, thank you, thank you Mandy! There is so much great stuff on there, and the handwriting is very personal. I especially liked the explicit lyrics warning on the CD from the sex blogger.

I could have sworn I had the first track in my library, but now I can't find it, so you have sent me cool music, a fun puzzle, and the first bit of the soundtrack to the next chapter in my life.

Listening to the Discovery Channel song while reading this post was a tad weird, though.

Steve

Anonymous said...

Would you please stop your whining about whoring? If it's that bad/tedious/whatever - get out of it. Otherwise, stop wasting our time here.

Bitch, bitch, bitch about something you choose to do! It's not exactly like you're getting up to go work a double shift at a factory because you have no choice.

Mandy said...

Randy, Steve - glad you got your cds! Thanks for being readers. I hope you'll enjoy the flow and the mystery :)

Lanib - I intended a level of irony and humor that I don't think actually came across in the post. So I didn't have a bad time (and there's more to come on that story), it's just badly written. And don't forget, you can always stop reading if it gets too sucky around here :)